I'm feeling a bit depressed. I think I am finally realizing that I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up. My back is all jacked up, I still need to drop some seriously unhealthy fat & I am feeling restless. I am not sure how or what all this means. Well, I know I need to eat clean forever, but other than that I am feeling anxious & restless.
I hate that my therapist passed away a year ago. I STILL have things to fix. Sigh...I am praying that I find someone that is like her. Someone who truly understands me. I'll tell you a secret, I want to quit my cush job. WHY WOULD I WANT TO DO THAT?!?!? The only thing I can come up with is that I truly don't want to be held responsible for anything right now except myself. I want to hole up, cook to my heart's desire & get healthy. Now...this could play out several ways. I can cry to my husband who just wants me to be happy. I can try to push through whatever the fuck is going on. Or I don't know what else. See? I can't see past my nose right now.
I am feeling like cocooning and just emerging and then moving on with other things in my life. I am still not a great life multi-tasker. One thing at a time...Sigh...Again...sigh....PLEASE UNI - throw me a bone. Perhaps some perspective?
Peace out...
Monday, September 16, 2013
Tuesday, September 3, 2013
I'm back :)
It's been over a year since I've posted & I think because I got tired of the same old same old. Anyway, I have a new blog with two of my friends ThreeFitFriends. I am writing here today instead of my friend blog because I just feel this is where I need to be. I haven't read any of my past posts & I am assuming there are a few doozies!
Well, I am still on my weight loss journey, but yesterday my Higher Self started talking & sometimes when she's RIGHT, she never ever shuts up. I am okay with that. I NEED her to blab in my ear until I do what I need to for myself. Right now, I am getting back into eating well. I did so awesome last year after my last post in 2012. But then, as I like to say, Life Happened. Hubs got let go from his job, I freaked & ate everything I could get my hands on - Turns out it was the best thing that happened to us :)
Now, I am just trying to get settled into my new routine/life. We moved into town from the suburbs, close to downtown & I love it! However, with city life comes city people & that is a bit to get used to. I am working part time as an admin assistant to the property manager for a high rise building downtown. I dig the vibe downtown. It's a lot more me than I thought it would be. So now I have no excuses to not put the right foods down my piehole. Today I do have allergies & am kind of feeling blech...but I am hungry. So I am going to go make myself a nice Paleo breakfast & go from there. Currently suffering from acid reflux, but my dr. seems to think we can get it under control.
I am giving myself 21 days to follow through on clean eating - no cheating. Then I will revisit exercise. I gained about 8 lbs from eating out almost every day since we've moved. Not good! I feel like crap & it shows. Well, I think that's it. I just wanted to jot down that my higher self is taking control for a while. Love to you all!!!
Well, I am still on my weight loss journey, but yesterday my Higher Self started talking & sometimes when she's RIGHT, she never ever shuts up. I am okay with that. I NEED her to blab in my ear until I do what I need to for myself. Right now, I am getting back into eating well. I did so awesome last year after my last post in 2012. But then, as I like to say, Life Happened. Hubs got let go from his job, I freaked & ate everything I could get my hands on - Turns out it was the best thing that happened to us :)
Now, I am just trying to get settled into my new routine/life. We moved into town from the suburbs, close to downtown & I love it! However, with city life comes city people & that is a bit to get used to. I am working part time as an admin assistant to the property manager for a high rise building downtown. I dig the vibe downtown. It's a lot more me than I thought it would be. So now I have no excuses to not put the right foods down my piehole. Today I do have allergies & am kind of feeling blech...but I am hungry. So I am going to go make myself a nice Paleo breakfast & go from there. Currently suffering from acid reflux, but my dr. seems to think we can get it under control.
I am giving myself 21 days to follow through on clean eating - no cheating. Then I will revisit exercise. I gained about 8 lbs from eating out almost every day since we've moved. Not good! I feel like crap & it shows. Well, I think that's it. I just wanted to jot down that my higher self is taking control for a while. Love to you all!!!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)