I think I can I think I can

Ok first of all, something really strange is going on with my keyboard. The vowels on my keyboard are being wonky. First the E key stuck & is working fine, then the A key did the same, & now I is doing it. I wonder if it's like Ghost whisperer & going to spell something like 'Hey hussie, here are the numbers for the lottery.' That would be really cool & then I'd know I was being haunted by a psychic ghost.

Anyway, so my dear friend Tex (I know, I talk about her a lot!! But I really love her dearly) let me know about Marilu Henner's Total Health Makeover. I am trying that on for size because I figure what do I have to lose? I have been very hard on myself for the past oh 34 years of my life & it's time to give myself a break. So the reason for my title is that I have one hell of a headache that makes me want to go play in traffic because I figure that would hurt a lot less. Damn! How many chemicals could I possibly have in my body? The proof is in the organic pudding I guess.

I am supposed to give up all harmful chemicals - for me that translates into processed food. I don't drink & don't smoke. Then I suppose dairy, which is easy for me because I am horribly lactose intolerant. Then sugar - the devil reincarnate (aside from my evil cat). Meat is something that I am definitely weaning myself off of.

There are some really exciting things happening in the next couple of days. Once they come to fruition, I will post & let you know what!!! I don't want to jinx anything. Rawr!

Ok-leaving this post with lots of love & good positive energy.

Asian Jamaican

So Not a Fan...

So I have decided that I am not a fan of my blog. Remember in the very beginning I had said I hate blogging? I am pretty sure it still stands true!!! With that being said, I may take this one down & then build another one back up. One that really reflects who I am :)

What's been up lately? The weather has been ok. Finally have a bit of cool weather that is conducive to being outside & running around. We have been letting the kiddos - i.e. the cats & dog - run around outside on their own. Our backyard is a fair size & for indoor cats it's like the Red Tree Forrest. My middle cat is evil. So evil. There was this beautiful butterfly that was floating around the backyard & the bitch totally went up to it & shredded its wings. WTF? Evil cat!! My beautiful little calico Bella, just watched the butterflies flutter by. Netflix, aka the Evil Beotch, can't stop hunting. Today my hubby took a half day & I was about to take a nap when I glanced out the window & Evil Beotch had a lizard in her mouth. Husband to the rescue! lol!!!

Sigh...sad to say, that is ALL that is going on in my life. I am realigning myself in mind, body & spirit & it's kind of slow. But again, I am ok with that.

OH! Something exciting, I totally got a library card this weekend. Hahahahaha! I know-totally dorky. I had no idea how to look for a book. How sad is that? I had to ask for help. But I got the book I wanted & all is well with the world.

Anyway, I'll post when & if I get to a new blog.

Peace Out Peops!

Going Vegetarian

Ok, so I tried the Raw Foods thing & failed miserably. Or let me rephrase more positively, it wasn't my thing! I can however, choose to make better choices for myself. I have been reading horrible things about ground beef & also the cruelty that goes into slaughterhouses. I know, I know. Some people are going to think I am a tree hugger hippie & maybe I am. But more than anything, at least I will be a healthy tree hugger hippie.

My goal for this week is to not consume any animal flesh or dairy. Dairy is easy for me to give up because Homeslice is horribly lactose intolerant. I mean it ain't pretty when dairy enters this body!!! Meat isn't so hard either to give up, but I am kind of lost as to what I should eat. I am stalking my vegetarian friends as we speak & some have been helpful & others just downright silly :) That's ok-I know for a fact this is going to be a process. I am ok with that. Getting away from processed foods is kind of hard too because they are everywhere among us like an alien invasion. I am also being drawn towards eating seasonally & locally. That is going to be hard mainly because farmer's markets are only on weekends (usually) and i have no idea what is locally grown here in Texas. I guess I am going to have to stalk farmer's market websites too. I may have to make a trip into town twice a week. Which in the big picture isn't so bad since I'll be investing in my health.

I finally got my exercises I need to do to get my body back into alignment. All I can say is that I have my work cut out for me. I am ok with that too. Well, if anyone has any advice on veggie meals or places I can stalk for info, please leave a comment!!!

Peace & Love!!!

Back to the Old Title

I think I am going to change my blog back to Totally in the Raw. It will mean that I am just writing from the heart & keeping it raw & real ;)

Also-I wanted to say that the Universe is a kind place. I desperately wanted to get into this nutrition program & I was feeling a sense of urgency (it starts Monday) which was making me anxious. So I consulted Tex and she said I needed to talk to her psychic. I was kind of freaked out about this because from what Tex has said, the psychic will rock my world. So I tentatively put in for a call back & waited like a kid the night before Christmas & well...nothing. I was bummed because I was looking for any way to give me a sign. Even Tex saw my tweet & pulled over so she could consult her laptop & to her dismay saw that the psychic was away. Love Tex so much!!!! She called me & made sure everything was ok. I was still sad as I knew that time was running out...I get off the phone with Tex & not 20 minutes later did the Ultimate Happy Head person call me :) I totally stole Happy Head person from Tex.

Even though we didn't have a consultation today, she just happened to call when I felt the most bewildered. It turns out that she is not only a therapist (she's actually more than this, but it's too much for me to remember to type), she is a psychic! The universe must have said it wasn't time for me to spend time with first psychic, but all in one happy head person instead. We talked for a bit & I have my first phone consultation. Tex has told me this lady will help me change my life. I look forward to a newer & happier life. The coolest thing yet, is she told me I would only need 3-6 sessions-That is How Good she is supposed to be!!!

I felt really at peace when I talked to HHP. Then my brother called & we had a long talk about monter in law & in laws in general. He helped me to gain a better perspective on how to handle & act, etc. I guess sometimes you just need to talk to someone else. My brother is the coolest of big brothers & I have always sought out his advice. I never thought about seeking advice for my own family stuff. Just an overall great day!!!! Things are happening & happening in a great way.

I really look forward to the next couple of months & what is to come. No pressure about weight or anything. My trainer is the coolest too!! had a quick chat with her. She said no kickboxing either!!! can u imagine?

Well-have a fantabulous day peops!!

Peace!

Anger Management

So, universally everything seems to be going ok for me. Nothing too great & nothing too bad. However, lately me & the hubman have been doing nothing but fighting about his family. He says that I don't act like myself around them & that's because I feel incredibly uncomfortable around them. I don't like being around crazy or hurtful. I mean, call me crazy, but wtf?

He says I hold onto things & really all that is for me is a process. I am one to hold onto hurt simply until I can let it go. I don't do it on purpose. I am just built this way. Is it the healthiest way? Probably not, but I also don't pull emotions out of thin air just to be an asshole. If you really know me, I am a pretty cool chick. I am not like many girls, I like to play rough & tumble & still look hot doing it. I grew up in a motorcycle shop & have an older brother. My parents have always been equal opportunists for both kids & have always been supportive. They give us our space & are there when we need them. How much cooler can that get? They don't lean on us or depend on us for anything, they let us be kids. How could I not turn out decent? I'd get my ass kicked solely by my family if I didn't.

Fast forward to the present. The reason I am so standoffish with the in-laws is that I am just not comfortable around them anymore. He says I focus on the negative...weeeeeeeeeeeeeelllllllllll....quite honestly I welcomed them with open arms when we started dating. I mean full on open arms. Take a shit on me - don't expect me to come back for seconds. That's with pretty much anyone or anything in my life.

So is it fair for him to say this? Maybe. Is it fair for me to be pissed & still not want to see them ever again? Maybe. But my point is that why should I have to act a certain way when I don't ask for this crazy shit? Why should I be the one who has to compromise when I don't compromise kindly with liars? Or, who says I have to not be me? I don't like that at all. It's a HUGE source of contention between us. I get incredibly pissed in the fact that I am even put in any fucked up situation simply because there wouldn't be a situation simply if we weren't in the same room ever. Or maybe I wouldn't get so pissed off just because I think a mother should truly love a child unconditionally & care that he is upset instead of wallowing in her own shit that she chose to do. I am the only sense of true normalcy he has, but maybe not. Maybe his fam is the norm & I am the weird fucked up part because I am normal?

He tells me to speak up. What?!?!?! Why should I even have to is my point. So ok, it's not awkward to have to put your in laws in their place? What the fuck ever. I mean truly-I am not sure what to do. Fine, I'll be myself, but it will be someone who tells it like it is because I have always been that way. Always! Whatever, I am one pissed off Asian right now & really feel like going kung fu on his ass. Tonight we were supposed to talk about my venture into my new nutrition program :( but the energy is so fucked up between us that I don't want to put that out there in the negative light.

Oh well...Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day.

Ducks in a Row

So I had an assessment done by my guru's equal today. I knew that Coach Kimmie would do right by me :) There are few people in my industry that I trust & she falls into the Trust category. The cool thing is that she doesn't just do the standard sit & reach test. She lays you down on your back & you just start to relax. She's totally sizing you up!! What I mean by that is she is looking for muscle imbalances & weakness. So pretty much I have all kinds of misalignments due to muscle weaknesses. She had me do a balance test in the beginning & I was all over the place!!! It was pretty funny looking. By the end of the session after she had me do all kinds of core & rehab exercises, I was completely stable (Insert the AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaah light here).

In a nutshell she told me I so shouldn't be doing CrossFit but that I can do regular strength training & I need to be walking 3 miles a day 5 x's a week. How do you like them apples? Better yet, how do I like them apples? I like it a lot! As a trainer, I want to be like Coach Kimmie. She is so knowledgeable & isn't just a counter of reps. I have mad respect for her. She told me to go to my island & I love that. She's right. She said to stop reading & overloading myself with information. As a person, intuitively I knew stuff was wrong with me. I could just feel it. So I have the next 6-8 weeks before I can turn my hardcore working out on. Which is ok. I finally have an answer &I feel good.

So tomorrow morning it begins! I will be walking my arse off. Oh!! About all my ducks in a row-now I have the workout part in control, I have found the nutrition aspect, I just need to manifest some $$ for it. My trainer is m'f'n expensive!!! So I am feeling a bit more calm about everything & feel like I am getting all my ducks in a row...So excited!!!

Peace!!!

Relief

Ok-things have been settled with monster-in-law. Peace is now reigning over our household :)

Other than that, I am just recovering from workout related injuries. I have an appointment with a trainer that is going to do a full assessment on me & see where my muscle imbalances lie, etc. She is an equal to my mentor & at this point, I just need help! I wish i could diagnose my own stuff, but it's out of my scope. Know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em, know when to walk away!!!

Anyway, thanks for bearing with me in my crazy in-lawness. Tomorrow, listening to my body, walking, weight lifting...We'll see what tomorrow brings!!

Peace!