Dream, Dream, Dream..Dreeeeeaaaaam

So if you had a reset button on life & could push it at any time, would you? Are you satisfied with what you have offered this lifetime or vice versa? My therapist said this is a time to push the reset button. I agree, but I am trying to push it with a plan.

Have you followed a lifelong dream & made it a reality? I am curious because I didn't really have a lifelong dream that evolved into a career. Mine are the basics like traveling the world, seeing exotic things & places, living somewhere other than Texas (all of which I have yet to do). I did follow a passion for fitness for a while, but I found that things in life are a lot harder than what my own reality was. So I faltered & fell out of step. I gained a whopping 50 pounds & on this tiny body frame it hurts & is uncomfortable. One conclusion I came to is that I have to do. Just like Nike says to - Just do it! The cool thing is, I have finally turned a corner where I am ok with how i look (well sort of) & knowing that I am working towards a better version of me.

My point is, that I think once my health & well being get somewhat centered, then my true passion will fall into place & I will be doing something I truly love. Right now, I am day dreaming of going back to school & studying anthropology. I am fascinated with archeaology & how we evolved & what happened where & what era. I want to go on a dig & find a new dinosaur or uncover a lost world. I think it will happen, but in stages.

I hope that life has given you what you have wished for & I hope you have given it back. I plan on it! Don't ever stop dreaming & believe in yourself. For whatever is your higher power, I believe he or she shines through you & your being. Just remember, that the only way for it to happen is to do.

Peace out!!!

Asian

Not yesterday, Not tomorrow, but Presently

I wonder what the title of this post is going to be. Not sure, I guess we'll see by the end of this post. So I have come a long way from hating my in-laws to being indifferent. I had a great talk with my mom & she said, 'You know, she's not your mother - I am. So just remember when she's acting like she does, that she is NOT your family. Who cares what she does?' So from talk with mom & months of therapy, she's right. Who gives a fuck what those dysfunctional retards do? No sweat off my back. What a freeing moment in my life.

Let's see...I am still working part time & I am making peace with working. My husband & I have come to the conclusion that if I feel well, then work won't really suck. Speaking of, I have hired a trainer & nutritionist. I am excited more about the nutrition than anything. I like my nutritionist, she is all about lifestyle. LIFESTYLE, not lifestyle changes. If you eat out 10 times a week, she caters to that. Of course I am nutrition illiterate & so the session I had last week will have to be repeated tomorrow. Not to mention I had been traveling a lot last month & got full on sick & took a while to recover. So paying attention to anything really went out the window. Now it's all about health. Health, health & health. Interestingly enough, I took this basal metabolic rate test & my shizz is LOW. Like my nutritionist has put me on a 1300 calories a day diet. Whoa. But I am ok with that because even though I am coming into my own, I am still incredibly embarrassed being a fat ass. From what my research has told me, Nutrition alone will help drop the lbs.

My hubby & I are doing well. No complaints & yes, he still spoils the hell out of me. I'm ok with that. Why not?!?!? I have unplugged from Face Book & am taking little steps to remove myself from outside influences. It really is about me & trying to be present. I have been branding myself though - purses & now I have added Gucci sunglasses to my repertoire. I know, I know, I have issues.

Anyway, I hope everyone is well & trying to be present in the moment. I am hoping to blog some more!!! Peace out!!

Asian