Day Two

So as you all know, I've been battling this silly little weight thing & have tried time & again to find my stride. It's been an incredibly huge emotional roller coaster & it's really hard to explain the why. One of the things I've discovered about myself is that my body is very sensitive. There are a lot of things that I shouldn't eat that mostly everyone else can. I understand the gluten/wheat thing. From what I've read, it's not that great for you. Dairy, well I love dairy, but my body pretty much says No. As for the meat, poultry side of things, I can eat that if it doesn't taste anything like it! lol - I know...bizarre, but true. Like fish, blech...cannot tast like fish!

There are soooooooooooooooooooo many different 'things' out there as to what to follow. More than anything, I try to listen to my body & seek the guidance of my therapist. Like I have decided to loosely follow Atkins induction Phase to get me jump started. Now, I am excited about this because I know it's something I can follow. I started it yesterday & only cried once (I'll explain this later). I'm not sure what my body is trying to tell me, but my right side lymph node in my armpit is really swollen & tender to the touch. Usually this happens when I eat badly, so I am not sure if it's a detox thing or my body is rebelling against the high protein/fat it's intaking. The second thing going on, is that I woke up with a lot more energy. However, I gained weight :( Sigh...I must push through & see what I can do!

So yesterday I was hungry & wanted to make a taco shell-les salad. I pulled out my Organic lettuce & it was really nasty. Brown spots everywhere...Blech! So I turned to plan B & decided to make some hamburger patties. They totally tasted awful & all I could think of was complete & utter fail. How the hell can you mess up a HAMBURGER patty? Well apparently I have found a way ;) So I told my husband about this & then just started bawling. I mean - snot slinging & tears rolling down my cheeks. The whole breathing abnormally. It was such a disappointment to me. I think it had to do with wanting this low carb thing to work so badly. So, my husband sweetly calmed me down & made me laugh & all was well.

Fast forward to this morning, I decided to cook breakfast for my husband. I was making bacon & the damn oil jumped out of the pan & burned me. So needless to say, the tears started rolling down my cheeks. My husband couldn't help but laugh (not in a mean way). I am so melodramatic! I was like 'This shit's too hard!!! ' Sigh...but I finished cooking for both of us (well Alex finished the bacon ;) for no other than safety reasons). I drank a cup of tea & watched The Real Housewives of Atlanta. I am much calmer now & will not give up hope. I may cry every day I am on this induction journey, but at least I am following through.

I hope all is well with everyone & thanks for being supportive on this journey!!!

Asian